Filed under: rants | Tags: cold weather, stupid people, winter
Time for a real entry. Sorry about the lack of updates (not that anyone really read this anyways).
I question whether or not Darwin’s Law is working or not. Because during my three years in college, I think the freshmen are getting more dumb.
Specifically the ones from Long Island. Or people from Long Island in general. They gripe and moan how cold it is when it’s 60 degrees out. Being that I’m from the area, and dealt with my share of REAL winters. 60 degrees is a balmy day. It’s like in Russia. In Russia they have winter and then they have the general winter which sets in a little later. The general winter is a lot colder and miserable than winter in Russia. Granted, our winters are nothing compared to Russia, but that’s what it basically is. We have winter (late November to December) and winter 2.0 (most of spring semester, which I think is a way to mock us by calling it “spring” when 6 feet of snow just fell). I love seeing how they react to “spring.”
Which brings me to the next point. I remember one time when I overheard a freshman (from Long Island, of course) how they go outside in jeans and a hoodie in winter. Dude, downstate winters are a lot more mild than the ones up here. Here you need to bundle up and look like an eskimo before setting foot outside. And no, you’re not allowed to complain that you’re cold when you’re wearing a mini skirt that barely covers your ass and a coat that isn’t made for a real winter.
Get used to winters where being outside for only a few seconds will make your face hurt. Survival of the fittest. And no, there isn’t really a thing called “spring” here.
And learn how to walk around campus instead of taking the shuttle bus, you lazy bastards. You can get to your destination faster on foot than waiting around for the bus.
Filed under: babblings | Tags: April, Canada, cold, Florida, spring, weather, winter
Dear Canada and who else it may concern:
Please stop with the winter weather. It’s April. I realize that winter is the eternal season in these parts, but have some mercy on the residents here. It’s supposed to be spring. I do not want to see snow and gale force winds in April.
And fix that bipolar weather issue you have, that way there is some sort of regularity in the seasons here. Not this winter in spring deal.
Canada, seek counseling for that rage of yours. It’s not healthy to lash out on us. Or at least send it somewhere else for a change like… Florida. I think they’ve been bragging about their beautiful weather for too long, and they should be taught a lesson and become the pansies they really are. No more whining about it being cold because it’s below 50 degrees. How about being in the negatives made only worse with windchill? I thought so.
Also, no one is allowed to complain about wind unless they live where I go to school. Which is sixty miles from Canada via Lake Ontario. We are subject to Canadian Rage. Your winds are what we call a light breeze. Suck it up and deal with it.
Excuse me while I thaw so I can have feeling in my face again.
My friends and I have coined a few new terms concerning the crappy weather the town we go to school is infamous for.
- Canadian Rage: (noun) Crappy weather in general that involves a lot of wind. It does not matter which direction the wind is coming from, but it will always be known as Canadian Rage. It also helps that along with gale force winds to have a snow/rain mixture falling from the sky. And at times, the same mixture falling up. Yes precipitation not only falls down but also up.
- Sky Flooding: (verb) Where we go to school, we do not have to worry about ground flooding. Instead we worry about sky flooding. This is the verb for the weather involved in Canadian Rage.
- Umbrella: (noun) A device used to keep a person dry in rainy weather… they do not work here. Also proves to be a useful tool to differentiate between the naive freshmen and the students that know better.
- Day Ball: (noun) The sun. The sun that is rarely seen here during the winter… or ever.
Filed under: rants | Tags: Canada, cold weather, Northeast, warmer climates, winter
Anyone who lives in a northern state (especially one that borders Canada) suffer unbelievably cold and miserable winters. I think Lewis Black puts it quite eloquently:
There have been many times where I walk outside to class with a list of things in my head that I need to do — BAM! Holy crap, I can’t feel my face! And at that point, my to-do list is lost in the gale force winds from Lake Ontario and I just concentrate on making it to class without dying of hypothermia. Or falling flat on my face. Whichever comes first.
Also, to all of you people that live down South. You have no right to complain that it’s cold during the winter when the average windchill in throughout the entire Northeast is -10, while you whine when it’s below 60 degrees! Stop being so weaksauce. At least you don’t need to bundle up like an eskimo in order to not catch pneumonia!
I think anyone who lives in the Northern part of the country, especially a state that borders Canada, will sympathize with me. In my case, not only am I subject to the winds from up north, but they are worse when in close proximity to Lake Ontario. And this also causes lake effect snow, which is just frikkin’ lovely.
I propose that we build a giant wall to block out the gale force winds coming from Canada. Or at least a giant hair dryer to at least make the air not as cold — this can also double as a snow melting machine of some kind, since it can melt the snow before it even hits the ground! Or declare war on Canada for being the cause of our miserable weather. Either solution works with me.
As you can see, I’m going slightly insane from being home for break.
I’m pretty sure that everyone has heard about the giant snow storm that slammed the Northeast yesterday (December 19, 2008). Well that was the last day of finals at my school, and that means a very miserable day for everyone that was still stuck on-campus.
I couldn’t go home before Friday because of my Spanish final. My original plan was to go home afterwards, however that was before the storm was predicted to arrive by Friday. Great. That and my dad called to tell me until Saturday. Well, I guess that means more time to do packing and the copious amounts of laundry I need to do.
Friday: 9:00 AM
No snow yet. In fact, it’s pretty clear. That is until I turn on the TV and see this giant green monster on the doppler radar coming towards my area. Not only that, but the list of closings and early dismissals from schools.
My old school district was closing schools early! That never happens! I take this as a bad sign when my high school has a half day when it never has half days even during the regular school year (with the way the classes are set up, we either have full days, delays, or close). So, I know it’s going to be bad once it does get here. That’s not a good thing.
I go take my final in the icebox of a classroom. My professor is late to his own final, of course. The nut case doesn’t even bother to show up on time for classes, what made me think that he would actually show up on time for his own final? By the time I leave, there is already a few inches of snow outside after an hour and a half.
[Fast forward to about 5 PM.]
Since all of the dining halls with the exception of two are closed, that means walking far for food. A lot of snow has accumulated and it’s bloody cold and windy. It feels as if the snow is stabbing your face. The snowplows can’t keep up trying to clear the roads and sidewalks, so walking was difficult. And trying not to fall on my face or ass is difficult too. I lose the feeling in my limbs and face within 30 seconds. Inside is good. Inside is very good. And considering I had an early morning, I pass out go to bed at 10 PM.
[More fast forwarding to Saturday morning.]
The storm has let up. That’s good. There is a lot of snow on the sidewalks and roads on-campus that hasn’t been cleared. That’s bad.
I pack up my car, which is a difficult task since there is a foot of snow to walk in. And I need to dig my car out… it’s a long process of trying not to fall on my face and not freeze. A half hour later, I can’t feel my legs, feet, and toes — but at least my car is no longer stuck. Drive off-campus and proceed to be pissed off that the roads have been salted and plowed except the ones on campus. Awesome. Grrr. At least it’s nice and warm in my car.
I somehow manage to get home in one piece, unpack my car (have yet to actually unpack anything from the suitcase or anything like that), shower, eat, pass out on my bed for several hours.
Filed under: school | Tags: autumn, cold, crappy weather, rain, snow, wind, winter
The infamous crappy weather in the town where my school is located has returned. I believe my friend who wears a certain hat only for winter jinxed it by putting said hat on a couple days ago. In addition to being miserably cold, it’s also windy. And raining.
Cold + wind + rain = pain.
Also, I would like to point out to the freshmen and transfers that umbrellas do not work here. And yes, that was me that was laughing at you as you were pathetically trying to wield your useless umbrella.
In addition to miserable weather, we’re also known for our very bizarre weather. On Sunday, it was cold, raining, and thundering. What. The. Hell. I somehow made it to the library without getting struck by lightening or falling on my face. I’m still not sure how I managed doing that.
So let’s see here, broken umbrellas, being struck by lightening, falling on one’s face, frozen appendages/internal organs, flus/colds/other ailments. Inside sounds like the better idea. Especially so when the classroom you’re in appears to not have a functioning heating system. [Cough]Spanish class.[/cough]
Dear Winter:
Please stop making me and everyone else around me miserable. You make it very impossible to walk to my classes without nearly dying from the extreme winds you cause. I nearly crashed into a park car from the stupid wind tunnel you have caused. In fact, I crashed into a snow bank because I was stupid and thought it would be safe to take a step after the wind died down a little. Wrong. You decide that as soon as I didn’t have firm footing to make me go flying into the snow bank. And even if I did have both feet on the ground and not move at all, you still make me manage to slowly slide into said snow bank.
Thanks. Really. Thanks a lot. I really enjoyed feeling as if I was going to die right then and there with my inability to move forward or back to my dorm.
Two girls had to help me move through the wind tunnel of death. It was very kind of them.
Then there is this thing called black ice. It is not very enjoyable to walk on. Especially early in the morning when there is no rock salt to either melt the ice or create some traction. Thank you for being so screwed up and make it above freezing thus melting all of the snow, only to freeze the roads and sidewalks the next day because you forgot to do your job of always being cold. Thanks. I almost fell on my face on my way to English.
I hate you.
Regards,
Disgruntled and Slightly Frozen Student
I sometimes wonder how stupid people can be. At least, the ones I run into on a daily basis. As you and the rest of the northern hemisphere knows it is winter. Therefore, it should be common sense to dress appropriately especially if you live in an area that is notorious for its snow storms (like me).
I don’t understand why some people wear flip flops when there is a foot of snow outside. In high school, there were girls who change out of their snow boots and into flip flops. Why?! The floors are wet with slush and puddles, and the school was too stupid/broke to afford proper heating for the building. Wouldn’t it be a bit cold for them? Although, not too long ago I saw some girl go to class wearing flip flops. I would like to mention that the previous night we got quite a bit of snow and not all of it was shoveled by the time I saw this. I would also like to mention that I live in a part of campus where it is a bit of a walk to any of the academic buildings. Yeah, you do the math.
On a side note, some idiot lit a candle on the first floor of my residence hall at 2 AM. This caused the fire alarm to go off and I was asleep. I do not think very clearly when I’m woken abruptly. I somehow manage to remember my winter coat… but not normal shoes. I wore my sandals out the door and quickly regretted it. Well, least it woke me up. In my defense, I was loopy and I usually wear my sandals when I’m inside the residence hall and they were the first shoes I saw.
To the idiot that caused all of this: you pissed off the entire building. I hope you’re proud of yourself because you’re screwed if anyone finds out.
Okay, back to the entry.
I also don’t understand why girls wear tiny, little mini skirts in the middle of winter either. And then they complain that they’re cold. *blank stare* You have got to be kidding me. It is called winter. In most places it will be cold, and we live in a place that gets a lot of snow. There is a foot of snow outside and there is another Nor’easter coming within the next few hours that will dump more snow on us. You are a frikkin’ idiot to wear flip flops and a mini skirt that barely covers your ass. Don’t complain that you’re cold if you’re too stupid to wear more sensible clothes for the weather!
